Another week of holiday viewing, another week of, mostly, disappointment and disgust. Let's see how it went...
HBO-Max crapped out a couple of new holiday offerings
Santa Inc.
After watching the opening episode of Santa Inc. I was left with a melancholy longing for the comparatively brilliant, heartwarming, poignant, and uplifting Dr. Seuss’ Grinch Musical of last year. But now that I’ve seen two episodes of Santa inc. I can never go back to the more innocent times of Dan Hagerty’s Elves, Home Sweet Home Alone, or Kirk Cameron’s Saving Christmas. Bad Christmas entertainment has reached its' peak.
It’s no secret that most Christmas movies made these days are created by people who don’t really care about, or for, Christmas. To them it’s just a job, a market to be exploited and a customer base, with surprisingly low standards, that rewards the least possible creative effort. Compared to the forces behind Santa Inc these folks are egg nog swilling, mistletoe wearing, holly swinging, carol singing saints.
Santa Inc. hates Christmas and it hates you. I don’t need to be in an abusive relationship with my holiday entertainment. So, excellent job HBO-Max, you’re driving me back to Hallmark who are merely cynical drones mining superficial, aspirational, performative sentiment for dollars. Hallmark-style movies are merely passively destroying the true meaning of Christmas, Santa Inc is on a kamikaze run against it.
8-Bit Christmas (2021)
Crappy, soulless A Christmas Story rip-off.
Let's see what Netflix has to offer...
Father Christmas is Back (2021)
Hijinks ensue, amongst a group of generally unpleasant and perpetually horny rich folk in the English countryside when the estranged patriarch of the family shows up unannounced for the holidays. Luckily the cast is pretty great and the writing's solid enough, so it’s not as insufferable as it might be.
The script has some pacing problems, most of the big dramatic moments are unearned and plot points sometimes appear out of nowhere without set up. Still, it’s the best 2021 production I’ve seen so far this year.
Elves (2021)
Danish YA horror. I’ve only watched the first couple of episodes and it seems fairly well made but the story, and in particular the dull characters, haven’t really grabbed me yet. I’m not certain I’ll return to it.
Merry Happy Whatever (2019)
The only laughter this holiday sitcom delivers are the canned variety. Junk.
How about The Roku Channel?
Christmas Time (2017)
Excruciatingly unfunny comedy. So bereft of humor that the idea this was a ’The Producers” style tax fraud crossed my mind.
Christmas in the Clouds (2001)
I wasn’t expecting much from this little indie comedy, despite The Roku Channels assuring me it was “critically praised”, but, despite the occasional lack of (camera0 focus, the less experienced actors, and obviously low budget, it was a nice, quirky little treat. The script is a cut above your average Christmas flick and primarily Indigenous cast and setting on the Rez seems organic and not merely a diversity stunt.
Christmas in the Clouds hits some familiar genre tropes but in a unique and charming way. What a nice surprise, especially after the train wreck of Christmas Time. My only gripe - not very Christmassy.
Drop the Dead Donkey - Xmas Party (1991)
Topical for its time, which won’t be great for those of you who weren’t following UK current events in late 20th century, but it’s still a great episode from a classic show.
Standing Room Only: Red Skelton's Christmas Dinner (1981)
Made for HBO back i the pre -Max days when garbage wasn't their main export.
Late career Red Skelton reprises his maudlin Freddie the Freeloader character, never my favorite, but Skelton still had the chops to pull off a heartwarming, if old fashioned Christmas show. Guests include Imogene Coca and Vincent Price.
What's Happening Christmas (1976)
Mama faces a Christmas alone when the kids spend the holiday at their dad's place.
A pretty good holiday episode.
The Flying Nun : Wailing in a Winter Wonderland (1967)
Sister Bertrille nearly bankrupts San Juan after fulfilling an elderly nun's Christmas wish.
Cute but inessential .
