Spunky the Snowman (Rifftrax)
Frosty isn’t the only magical snowman in town, here comes Spunky!
Not the best holiday short the Rifftrax boys have done but it’s still got a few great riffs.
A Gift Wrapped Christmas (2015)
A perky personal shopper meets a workaholic single dad and mediocrity ensues. Not awful but not good.
Is it Hallmark? Lifetime
Does it feel like Christmas? Not to me.
Did I finish it? No.
Saving Christmas (2014)
I’ve been lied to! This is not a terrible movie. Letterboxd told me it was one of the worst movies ever made. Of course, most of the people saying that probably haven’t seen the thing but hey, review bombing is what all the cool film school wannabes are doing right?
It’s not terrible and, most importantly, it’s not a movie. It’s Christian edutainment. It’s an hour of reconciling secular Christmas with Liberty University (who produced it) flavor Christianity. If you didn’t do your due diligence, like reading the description, and jumped in thinking it was some sort of cheesy holiday comedy, a low rent Jingle All the Way, then sure you’d be disappointed, but that’s on you.
That said, it’s not great either, it is what it is. A Christian version of those “History of / Truth About” Christmas documentaries that pop up each season on History and Discovery and so forth (the same folks who bring us Ancient Aliens, dozens of Bigfoot shows and Real Mermaids), and I’m no more offended or annoyed at the bits I disagree with in those than I am with the bits I disagree with here. The acting ranges from Hallmark to Direct to Tubi and there is a truly cringe-worthy dance scene that pads out the running time at the end.
If you’re not evangelical (or at least Liberty adjacent) this probably isn’t the flick for you. Even if you are you might not care for it. But, I have seen a dozen far worse things this month alone (I watch a lot of movies). So, if watching Kirk Cameron explain why a few of our secular traditions do, or can, have deeper Christian meaning lights your tree, then check it out.
Home for the Holiday (1995)
I feel blessed that whatever family holiday dysfunctions my extended clan have (and we have some doozies) none of us are as insufferable as the characters in elevated holiday family dramas like this.
My least favorite Jodie Foster directorial offering. It is, at least, a fairly well-made film with some solid performances. I just didn’t care about anyone, or anything, in it.
It may sound like I’m recommending Saving Christmas over Home For the Holidays but I’m not. Home for the Holidays is exponentially better as a film, it just didn’t do anything for me.
Alone in the Woods (1996)
Like Home for the Holidays, Alone in the Woods is a Thanksgiving movie. Instead of being a Jodie Foster joint it’s from the director of The Poseidon Adventure (2005 version), American Pie: The Book of Love and My Ghost Dog. Sort of a Home Alone meets The Ransom of Red Chief, sort of. Whatever it is, it isn’t very good. Kid’s with a soft spot for slapstick might get a kick out of it. Me, not so much.
